I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize