My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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