I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
