I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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