i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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