I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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