He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
