i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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