I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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