Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
