haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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