"it" just moved
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
We left an ass print on the piano.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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