I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
