we were pretty classy up until the second keg
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
