Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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