Non-Jews are for practice
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
