If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Randomize
