It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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