can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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