i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
