no, he came in my armpit
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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