She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
