Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
