No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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