she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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