You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Michael Bay diarrhea
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
