Already got asked if we're dating
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
