New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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