put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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