question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
