The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
