You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
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