you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
They are going to name an STD after you.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
You are a genius and a whore.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
