i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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