whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
