i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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