Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Are we still banned from the library?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
