Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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