What did we do last night that was yellow?
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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