If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Randomize
