Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
