Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
