I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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