We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
