Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
a search helicopter?!
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
