i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
