There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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