If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize
