i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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