let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
